The 19 Best Ways to Know If A Married Woman Likes You More Than A Friend

You’re picking up some clear hints that a married female coworker is interested in more than a professional relationship.

Or are you just imagining it?

After all, some people are friendlier than others.

Maybe she sees you as a real friend at work, so naturally, she shows you more attention than she does to others.

You have a connection of sorts. You’re just not sure what she expects.

And you don’t want to give her the wrong idea.

So, what are the signs a married woman is attracted to you?

How Do You Tell if She Likes You More than a Friend? 

Even if she’s married and doesn’t want to arouse suspicions, a woman who wants more than friendship with you will show her interest in any of the following ways: 

  • Closer proximity to you
  • Increased presence and interaction
  • More smiles and laughter
  • Curiosity about you
  • Frequenting your usual spots

If the interest isn’t mutual, the best way to cool her interest is to let yourself be seen with another woman (a love interest) or simply avoid her as much as possible. 

How Do You Tell If an Older Married Woman Likes You? 

Women who’ve been married to the same man for years or even decades might find you appealing for the following reasons: 

  • You remind them of what it was like to be younger and still single. 
  • They want to be young and to fall in love again. 
  • You’re the kind of guy they would have loved to date 10 or 20 years ago.

You become the embodiment of their “younger self” fantasy. Maybe another 10 or 20 years with the same person and the same routine doesn’t appeal to them. You could be their fountain of youth. Tread carefully. 

How Do You Tell If a Married Woman Is Not Interested in You? 

Maybe you seem too interested in her. Or perhaps you got the wrong idea from the one smile she gave you last week. She’s not having any of that, so…

  • She’s more aloof around you;
  • She doesn’t laugh at your jokes (even when they’re funny);
  • She avoids your company whenever possible.

It’s not because she doesn’t trust herself not to succumb to your charms. She’d just not into you. 

How Do You Make a Married Woman Fall Madly in Love with You? 

If you know this woman has a happy marriage, your attraction to her isn’t a valid excuse for manipulating her. Let her go. 

But maybe you know her husband is an abusive man-child who doesn’t deserve her. And you two definitely have chemistry and a blossoming friendship.

If you’ve fallen head over heels for her, but she’s not quite there yet, what can you do to close the gap?

  • Ask if you can meet for coffee to discuss a work thing. 
  • Encourage her to vent her frustrations about her husband. 
  • Interact with her on social media.
  • Pay her genuine compliments to show you notice the little things.
  • Show her you can be discreet when showing a preference for her company.

That last one is important because even if she’s unhappy in her marriage, she won’t want anyone to suspect she’s not being faithful. 

Women pay a higher price for infidelity, and if you can show her you value her reputation, she’ll be more likely to consider a private relationship with you. 

How to Know if a Married Woman Likes You More Than a Friend: 19 Obvious Signs

When a married woman likes you as more than a friend, she’ll show it in a variety of ways, as you’ll see here. The more you see the following behaviors, the more you can be certain she sees you as more than a friend. 

Since it’s so often the case that the married woman is someone you work with, it’s not a stretch to call these signs a married female coworker likes you.

Only if you’re aware of them can you take steps to handle the situation appropriately.

1. She always finds a reason to be near you.

It’s one thing if she enjoys your company. You might just be someone she feels comfortable around and whose ideas she wants to hear more of.

Or maybe she has a problem and she thinks you could help her with it. Maybe you’re one of the few people she trusts, and her awkward behavior around you is just that.

It’s another thing if she’s always hanging close by and finding reasons to be where you are as often as possible.

If she can’t seem to let you pass without making some attempt to get your attention or without making an excuse to keep you around, consider that a red flag.

2. She acts jealous when you socialize with other women.

If the sight of you with another woman is enough to get her away from her desk and back to your side, eager to hear whatever you’re saying, you’re allowed to be concerned.

If she acts in a hostile or passive-aggressive manner toward other women she sees around you (particularly the ones acting friendly), that’s another warning sign.

When she interrupts a conversation you’re having with a woman and says things to change your view of the “other woman,” take it as clear evidence that she’s begun to see you as someone she wants all to herself.

3. She wants to know all about your life and family.

She’s asking you questions about your family, how you spent your weekend, what relationships you value most, etc. She wants to know everything about you.

On the flip side, she doesn’t share much about her own family, especially her husband.

Or she might drop a few hints that her marriage isn’t what she hoped it would be or that her husband is a different person at home (and not different in a good way).

There are two goals here:

  • To show she’s interested in everything that matters to you, and
  • To get you thinking you would be a better match for her.

4. She favors you over other coworkers or male associates.

The way she acts toward you — compared to the way she acts toward others at work — clearly shows who her favorite is. She doesn’t hide her preference for your company over that of any other male associate.

It makes you uncomfortable at times, because if you can see it, other coworkers probably can, too. Her favor puts you in an awkward position.

You don’t want to be considered her pet, but neither do you entirely dislike her marked preference.

I mean, who can blame her?

5. She looks for reasons to initiate touch.

When she gets all touchy-feely, there’s more than one way to interpret that:

  • She’s one of those people who use touch as a love language, and it’s not specific to you. It’s just her way of showing empathy, concern, or appreciation.
  • She believes touch is something “normal” people do to express friendship.
  • She’s showing particular interest in you and initiating touch more frequently with you than with anyone else.

Touch doesn’t always indicate romantic interest.

But if you’re the only one she’s touching or if she’s initiating touch every time you’re around, she’s showing a clear interest in more physical contact.

6. She makes seductive overtures.

She’s giving you focused “Come hither” looks far too often. It’s creepy — or confusing.

If she then realizes how she might have looked and steers clear of you out of embarrassment, it’s probably not about you. Take a deep breath and move on.

But if she seeks you out and tries to follow-up on that look to cement the impression that she’s into you, the seductive overtures probably won’t stop there.

Keep an eye out for flirty smiles, lingering looks, and weird “Oh, dear, how clumsy of me” behavior. If she’s being this obvious in her pursuit, it’s time for a plan.

7. She can turn any conversation into a flirtation.

No matter what you’re talking about, she’ll find a way to work in a flirty question or an off-color joke.

She’ll take advantage of any chance to get you alone, maybe by saying things no one else wants to hear or maybe by directly asking you for a private chat.

Once you’re alone (or as alone as you can get in your workplace), she ramps up the flirtation, clearly hoping you’ll reciprocate.

And depending on your professional relationship with her, taking an obvious step back could have repercussions.

But taking a step closer to her definitely will.

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8. She texts you at odd (or inappropriate) hours.

What is it with this woman? She texts you like she’s your bestie at odd hours of the day, even on weekends. And you don’t know how to tell her to stop without offending her.

She seems to think you two have something so special it’s worth interrupting your family time and possibly even getting the attention of your wife or girlfriend (if you have one).

She doesn’t seem bothered by the possibility that her texts might put you in the hot seat.

If she’s trying to inject herself into every part of your life, via text message (or other intrusive methods), you have a right to be concerned.

9. She seems nervous when you’re around.

Granted, this isn’t always a red flag. Some women will be nervous around you — not because they want to be something more to you but because they get nervous around other people (maybe guys in particular). In that case, it’s not about you.

But if she acts nervous around you because she’s afraid of putting you off or losing your interest, she’ll show that in other ways, too.

For example, nervous as she gets, she’ll still find ways to spend more time around you. And you’ll see other evidence of her interest.

Look for other signs on this list, though, before you decide her nervousness equals attraction — or that attraction means she’s in pursuit.

10. She can’t keep her eyes off you.

It’s one thing if she’s paying attention when you’re talking and maintaining eye contact — which is something most of us are told is the polite thing to do.

It’s another if she can’t stop herself from watching you, stealing glances when you’re near, and burning a hole in your back when it’s turned. You can feel her eyes on you, and you’re not sure how to send the message that it makes you uncomfortable.

If she can’t keep her eyes from following you whenever you’re in sight, that’s another sign she’s interested. And much depends on how you handle that.

11. She invites you — and you alone — to meet her for drinks, coffee, etc.

This is a clear “I like you, and I want to spend more time with you alone” red flag. Unless you two are on a secret project together and have to discuss the details privately, there’s no reason she should be asking you to meet her someplace alone.

It’s a clear sign she’s interested in having you to herself, which is a problem if she’s married.

And as well as you two might get along together, it’s best to gently decline the offer. You can even express your eagerness to get back home to your wife/girlfriend/family.

12. She laughs at all your jokes (even the ones you don’t think are funny). 

Even when you know the joke is corny or even awful, she laughs. And she laughs more than anyone else. She wants you to know she appreciates your sense of humor. 

The same joke coming from another person would not elicit the same reaction. Even funnier jokes wouldn’t because the humor is not the point. 

As in other signs, though, it pays to notice the differences between her behavior toward you and how she responds to others. If she laughs at other coworkers’ terrible jokes, you might have nothing to worry about.

13. She looks for reasons to ask you questions for your help.

If she needs help with something, you’ll be the first person she asks. Otherwise, she’s more likely to do it herself. 

If you’re the only one she asks for help, she’s showing a clear preference for your company. She might be looking for a chance to compliment you on your job well done or to express her appreciation for you. 

And this is not something you’ve ever seen her do with anyone else. If anything, she declines offers of help from others, even when her need for it seems obvious. 

14. She asks you to walk her home — or to her car. 

You’ve never known her to ask anyone to accompany her to her car, but now she asks you, saying she doesn’t feel quite safe doing so alone anymore. 

Maybe she’ll blame it on crime statistics. The bottom line is she’s nervous about walking alone, and you make her feel safe. It’s a genuine compliment, but you know anyone seeing you two walk out together will likely jump to conclusions. 

You want her to be safe. You also know how the grapevine works. 

15. She tends to hover nearby when you’re socializing. 

You can’t break for coffee and a friendly chat with coworkers without her showing up. She doesn’t always have a clear reason for doing so, either. 

It’s as if she knows when you’re not at your desk, and she always finds you. Granted, she could just be bored. Or she likes you and is hoping for friendship (which she might not have with her husband). 

She might not know yet what she wants. But she clearly likes to be wherever you are.

16. She puts more effort into her appearance. 

She’ll put more time (and expense) into looking good. She’ll up her skincare and cosmetics game and find outfits that flatter her figure. 

She’ll put in the work to look like the kind of woman she thinks you’d be attracted to — the kind of woman you’d be proud to have on your arm because that’s where she wants to be. 

You’ve noticed she even goes to the bathroom to refresh her make-up after eating her lunch. And if you happen to pay her the slightest compliment (“You look nice”), she can’t help showing how pleased she is.

17. Her voice changes when she talks to you. 

She sees you, and suddenly she perks up. Smiles come more easily, and she seems genuinely happy to see you. But what’s with the sudden change in her voice? 

It sounds deeper, softer, more seductive. Maybe she’s conscious of it, but it’s not unusual for a woman’s voice to change when talking to someone she finds attractive. She may not even be fully aware of the change in her voice and her body language toward you.

You can better gauge her interest when someone calls her out for the changes they see in her when you’re around. 

18. She makes an effort to find out more about you. 

If she doesn’t dare ask you to your face, she’ll find out in other ways. She wants to know what you like, how you spend your time (and with whom), and what you most enjoy talking about. 

The more determined she is, the more she’ll learn about you. How she uses it will depend on the signals she’s picking up from you. 

If she gets the vibe you’d rather she left you alone, or she sees that you prefer other women’s company to hers, she’ll probably back off and turn her attention to other things.

19. She’ll put on a show to highlight her troubled marriage. 

You see her on the phone, and, at first, you don’t notice the distress or misery on her face. 

When it registers, and you stop to observe, she says something in a broken voice and hangs up, suddenly noticing you (“Oh! I didn’t see you there…”) and letting you know, “That was my husband.” 

Then she swallows, clears her throat, and tears up a bit, pretending to get back to work but throwing furtive glances, clearly hoping you’ll ask if she’s okay and what on earth her husband said that upset her so much. Game on. 

What Do I Do If a Married Woman Likes Me?

If you’re seeing many of the signs described above, you may be wondering one of two things:

  1. Are there good reasons not to get involved with her (if the attraction is mutual)?
  2. What should you do in response to these signs?

Starting with question number one, yes, there are plenty of good reasons why you should not get involved with a married woman, even if the attraction is mutual.

First, you have no idea what her husband might do if he finds out (and he will).

Second, you don’t know whether she’s cheated before or exactly what’s driving her willingness to step out of her marriage.

These situations can be weird, messy, and complicated.

Third, extramarital affairs don’t end well. And they do end.

Fourth, you could both lose your jobs, because your behavior reflects poorly on your employer, who will eventually find out.

Even if you don’t lose your jobs, the messy situation you’ve both created will have an effect on workplace morale, as well as your ability to focus on your work.

Fifth, if there are children involved, your affair will cause them pain and suffering.

So, what should you do?

  • Ignore the signals. Pretend you don’t notice them, and go about your work.
  • Treat her as you treat other co-workers, with equal respect and professionalism.
  • Try to make yourself less accessible to her to avoid inappropriate conversations.
  • Address the behaviors directly and let her know they make you uncomfortable.

Be kind, but keep your distance. Be aware that she’s likely to misinterpret even the slightest show of friendliness. She’s in a vulnerable state, and the best thing to do is to avoid her as much as possible.

If she recognizes how she’s coming across and is appalled or embarrassed by it, chances are, she’ll back off.

Are you seeing the signs a married woman likes you more than a friend?

Now that you’re aware of the signs a married woman likes you more than a friend, which ones have you seen lately? Which are most obvious?

If the married woman in question keeps upping her flirtation game, taking a step back and politely excusing yourself may be enough to send the message that you’re not interested in pursuing a relationship.

She might take offense. But the more you gently and professionally send the message that you’re there to work (not flirt), the more likely she’ll get that message and back off.

The cost of encouraging her is too high.