13 Indisputable Signs Of Attraction You Must Know

Have you ever held off asking someone out until you know the other person is interested in you?

Or have you held back showing interest yourself because you can't tell if the guy is attracted to you?

Men and women often struggle to pick up on the involuntary signs of attraction, leading to some awkward encounters and missed opportunities.

When you struggle to know whether someone is attracted to you, your confidence as a suitor starts to melt away.

Fortunately, you can learn to read the signs of attraction and feel more confident about approaching a potential date.

Our bodies respond subconsciously to feelings of attraction. People tend to use a variety of nonverbal cues, often without realizing it.

You can stop missing out on dating opportunities due to your inability to detect interest.

But first you need to know exactly what you're dealing with.

What Is Attraction?

Attraction is a natural part of life and is experienced by almost every animal species. Without attraction, populations would decline rapidly.

As with other aspects of biology, researchers have thoroughly explored the phenomenon of attraction.

Psychologists tend to define interpersonal attraction as the attraction between two people that leads to platonic or romantic relationships.

When talking about romantic relationships, psychologists often divide attraction into three main elements:

Physical attraction
Psychological attraction
Behavioral attraction


In a romantic situation, physical attraction is often the first element. People are attracted to others based on their looks.

Then when you start talking to this appealing person, you may find that you enjoy his or her personality or discover that you agree on a lot of topics. This is a psychological attraction.

Behavioral attraction involves a person's behaviors, traits, and body language.

The combination of these three elements leads people to use a variety of verbal and nonverbal signs of attraction.

13 Indisputable Signs of Attraction

Let's take a look at the not-so-obvious signs that a man or woman is interested in you, as well as the cues you might get from someone who is an introvert.

Powerful Signs of Male Attraction

Traditionally, men initiate the courting ritual, approaching a woman and asking her out or sparking up a conversation.

However, not all men are direct.

Pay attention to the following signs of attraction from a man:

1. He lowers his voice when talking to you.

While men and women both lower their voices a few octaves, this behavior is more common for men. Psychologists believe that this is connected to biology.

Women are naturally attracted to a deeper voice as it is a sign of masculinity. At the same time, men naturally deepen their voices, often without realizing it, to appear more attractive.

2. He checks out your figure.

Studies show that men are easily turned on by visual stimulation. Simply looking at a beautiful woman's figure is enough to arouse most men.

Guys try to be discreet about staring. However, you may notice that his gaze occasionally lowers to your chest or follows your rear as you walk away.

3. He shows off and preens.

While women sometimes “preen” themselves to appear more attractive to potential mates, men also engage in this behavior.

couple talking inside bar while drinking beer signs of attraction

However, instead of constantly fixing their hair or lipstick, they are more likely to show off their skills or physical traits. This type of “preening” occurs in nature with a variety of species, including most apes.

A guy may try to perform a stupid stunt, carry heavy boxes, or show off his strength in some way.

4. He goes out of his way to talk to you or be around you.

You may receive a text message as soon as you get out of work or find him waiting for you at your favorite lunchtime spot.

If he constantly tries to find excuses to spend more time with you, he most likely wants to develop more of a relationship.

5. He flirts with you.

However, it is much less common for men to actively flirt or engage in harmless flirting with platonic acquaintances. Men typically only flirt with women who they are attracted to.

These are just a few signs that a man is interested in you. Other potential signs include buying gifts or getting jealous when you are talking with other men.

Female Body Language Signs of Attraction

Some of the most common signs of attraction from a woman include nonverbal signs such as body language. Women are less direct compared to men.

Instead of “hitting on” you, a woman is more likely to flirt using some of these signs:

6. She uses open body language.

When a woman is not interested, she is more likely to stand in a defensive posture. She may cross her arms or legs while turning her body away from you.

If a woman is interested, she will face you. She may even mirror your stance and posture. If your right leg is slightly forward, she may move her right leg forward.

Mirroring and facing you are signs that she is comfortable with you and potentially attracted to you.

7. She leans in.

Women tend to lean in when romantically interested in someone as they want to be closer to the person.

However, some people simply have no sense of personal space. Try to see how she interacts with others. Does she still lean in when others talk? If it only occurs when you speak, she may be interested.

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8. She connects with her eyes.

While maintaining eye contact is considered good social behavior, a woman is likely to hold her gaze when she is attracted to you.

During a conversation, most people will look at you but then look away occasionally. Prolonged eye contact is often a subconscious act.

If a woman is not interested, she is more likely to look around the room and avoid locking eyes with you, indicating that she wants to escape the conversation.

9. She smiles frequently.

Smiling is another nonverbal sign of attraction. As with eye contact, people smile to be friendly.

If a woman is attracted to you, she may also flash you a smile for no reason, give you a coy smile when no one else is looking, or smile every time that you enter a room.

She’s also likely to hold her gaze as she smiles at you.

10. She's touchy.

Touching you is a less subtle sign, but many guys overlook it. These light, flirtatious touches are great indicators of attraction.

In most situations, a woman does not go out of her way to touch a guy who she is not interested in.

man and woman in suit flirting with each othersigns of attraction

When there is no reason for physical contact, touching you becomes a strong sign.

Keep in mind that some of these examples do not always signal attraction. Look for repeated behaviors.

If a woman accidentally touches your arm once in a crowded room, she may not be interested.

If she repeatedly touches your arm throughout the conversation, such as when you tell a joke, she is showing interest.

Introvert Signs of Attractions

Introverts are more likely to use involuntary signs of attraction. The following subtle cues are often performed subconsciously:

11. They blush when with you.

Men and women introverts may blush when talking to a crush. It is one of the most common signs of attraction.

Women frequently wear blush to mimic this natural effect and appear more attractive. Introverts tend to blush when embarrassed or uncomfortable.

However, if they simply blush when you look at them or during a normal conversation, they are likely attracted to you.

12. They have nervous body language.

Nervous tics are subconscious signs that an introvert likes you.

To calm themselves, introverts are more likely to fidget when talking to a person that they like. Twirling the hair or picking at a loose thread are a couple of examples of nervous behavior.

They may also rub their hands together, blink more frequently, or touch their faces a lot.

13. Their pupils dilate.

Dilated pupils (the black dots in the middle of your eyes) are the biggest sign of attraction.

Research shows that your eyes dilate when you look at something or someone who you are attracted to.

The purpose of eye dilation is to allow you to focus on what is right in front of you.

man and woman laughing together outside signs of attraction

Research also found that you only need a small amount of arousal for your pupils to start dilating, making it one of the earliest signs of attraction.

If the pupils appear large, the introvert is likely attracted to you.

Since introverts tend to use less direct methods to reveal they are attracted, look for subconscious signs of attraction.

Blushing, nervous behavior, and dilated pupils are things that people cannot control.

While these may occasionally be signs of poor health, they typically mean that the person is attracted to you.

Can you recognize the signs of attraction?

You are likely to use a variety of verbal and nonverbal signs to show that you are attracted to someone. The person who you are attracted to may also use subtle signs of attraction to let you know how they feel.

If you fail to pick up on his or her cues, you may miss out on a great new relationship. So remember to stay alert to the other person’s subtle signals.

Extended eye contact, touching, flirting, and leaning in are often nonverbal signs of attraction that can make you more confident that the attraction is mutual.

In the end, if you still cannot tell if the other person is interested, go for it and just ask the person out. You don't have anything to lose — except for a little bruised ego.

Men and women often struggle to pick up on the involuntary signs of attraction, leading to some awkward encounters and missed opportunities.  When you struggle to know whether someone is attracted to you, your confidence as a suitor starts to melt away. signs of attraction body language | signs of attraction men | signs of attraction crushes
Barrie Davenport

Barrie is a certified life coach and Wall Street Journal bestselling author. She has been a featured writer for The Huffington Post, Maria Shriver, and Zen Habits. She is the creator of six popular self-improvement courses. She writes books on relationship skills, emotional abuse, mindfulness, and more.

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