Twin Flame vs. Soulmate: 11 Differences You Should Know

You thought the whole idea of soulmates was more about poetic license than reality—until you met this person.

And it’s as if you’ve always known each other. 

Yet you can’t recall ever meeting them before.

You’ve heard a little about both twin flames and soulmates, but you’re not sure which one this person is—or whether it even matters. 

Let’s say it does, though.

How do you tell the difference?

What Are Twin Flames? 

A simple twin flame definition describes it as two souls who are each half of one or mirrors of each other, which is why they’re also called “mirror souls.” 

couple face to face outdoors twin flame soulmate

Twin flames share a deep, intense connection because they share the same strengths and weaknesses — and often the same pain, which draws them closer. 

So, in a nutshell, you can spot twin flames by the following markers: 

  • They’re instantly drawn to each other; 
  • They mirror each other’s strengths and weaknesses; and
  • They often develop a quick and intense romantic connection

What Are Soulmates? 

A soulmate connection differs from a twin flame connection in the following ways:

  • Instead of mirroring each other, soulmates balance each other out;
  • Soulmates are different enough to be naturally compatible with each other;
  • Soulmates can share a romantic love or a deep, platonic friendship. 

It seems like the perfect relationship, right? It’s tempting to think soulmate connections are superior to what twin flames share. But it’s not that simple. 

Can Your Twin Flame Be Your Soulmate? 

This brief overview gives you some idea of the difference between a soulmate and twin flame, but how different are they, really? Both tend to forge quick and strong connections. 

So, can your twin flame also be a soulmate—or vice-versa?

Despite their apparent similarities, twin flames cannot be soulmates because they’re too alike. While soulmates belong together in a blissful unity of different minds, twin souls help each other grow in self-awareness and self-love. And growth can be messy. 

The two are not the same. And life is better with both. 

Which is Better—Soulmate or Twin Flame? 

Neither is better because both serve different purposes. While both soulmates and twin flames have the power to improve your life vastly, each brings something different to it. 

Twin flame relationships can go down one of two roads: 

  • At their best, they help each soul grow into their fullest potential; 
  • At their worst, they can amplify insecurities and lead to tumultuous relationships.

Soulmate relationships are naturally compatible and often less challenging than a twin flame relationship, making it easier but less likely to stimulate learning and growth. 

It doesn’t mean they can’t; soulmates often do help each other become better versions of themselves. 

It’s not so much a question of soulmate vs. twin flame.

The differences between them only serve to highlight each one’s potential for making life better—as you’ll see in the list below.

Twin Flame vs. Soulmate: 11 Differences You Should Know 

Now you’ve seen soulmates and twin flames explained, it’s time to dig a little deeper. Only when you explore everything that sets the two apart can you determine whether the person you know is a twin flame or soulmate. 

Look through the differences below and make a note of the qualities you see in the person in your life whose connection to you is stronger than any other. 

1. Soulmates are meant to be together. Twin flames are meant to teach you something about yourself. 

That second bit regarding twin flames goes for both of you: your twin flame is there to mirror your own strengths and weaknesses to help you see them more clearly — so you can see what needs your attention. 

The relationship is meant to teach you both something you need to learn. 

Soulmates are kindred spirits who get along well and tend to help each other grow (if more slowly) without the conflict or chaos that can often characterize twin flame relationships. 

2. Soulmates are naturally compatible. Twin flames are too similar to be compatible. 

When you meet someone who mirrors your own weaknesses and insecurities, you feel that you recognize them. But it’s natural not to want to be confronted with the things you don’t particularly like about yourself. 

It feels like a confrontation, anyway. You see the things you don’t like in yourself mirrored in your twin flame—along with things you do like about yourself. 

couple kissing behind hat twin flame vs soulmate

That familiar mix draws you in and can even feel like a sort of vindication (“Look how awesome they are — and you’re so alike! So, you must be awesome, too. Knew it.”)

That similarity, though, means you don’t really compliment each other; you share the same strengths, along with the same weaknesses. In other words, your strengths don’t offset their weaknesses, and vice-versa.

You’re drawn together. But you don’t really fit together. 

3. You can only have one twin flame. You can have more than one soulmate. 

Not everyone has a twin soul, but you can only have one as a rule. The reason for this is the idea that twin souls are two halves of a whole–which is why you might feel more like a complete person when your twin soul is near. 

This can lead to problems, as you’ll see further on. 

Everyone has a soulmate. And with soulmates, you can even have more than one. 

A soulmate relationship can be either romantic or platonic. You could have a soulmate who’s your partner and another soulmate who’s your best platonic friend. You always enjoy each other’s company. You’re different people who feel at ease with each other. 

4. Twin flame relationships can become toxic. Soulmate relationships do not.

Not only do twin flames mirror each other’s best and worst qualities, but they also tend to amplify both, which—if neither do the work of addressing their problem areas—can lead to chaotic and even destructive relationships. 

If you’re both insecure and tend toward passive-aggressive behavior, you’ll both be using those tactics on each other. 

Both could be making assumptions about the other’s motives while acting on those assumptions in ways that undermine and eventually destroy the relationship. 

On the other hand, soulmates are different enough to help balance each other out. They’re also accepting of each other’s whole selves and less likely to judge or assume the worst. Both want to help the other heal and grow. 

5. Twin flames can become overly dependent on each other. Soulmates remain independent. 

With a strong twin soul connection, you feel less whole when separated from them. Separating from them feels like losing an essential part of yourself. 

Saying goodbye feels like a kind of death. Because in a very real sense, it is. You’re breaking away from someone who feels so much like you — what you love and what you don’t love about yourself.  It feels as though you’re breaking apart. 

And you’re (both) likely to resist that, even if separation is what you both need. 

On the other hand, soulmates are different enough to still feel separate from each other.

Complementary as they are, they don’t feel as if death would be the natural consequence of separation, even if both would prefer death, given a choice. 

They remain independent souls. And they love that about each other. 

More Related Articles

159 Romantic Things To Do With the One You Love

13 Effective Communication Exercises For Couples

9 Core Differences Between Love And Being In Love

6. Twin flames may feel a need to escape each other or take time apart. Soulmates do not. 

Separation is often one of the stages of a twin flame relationship because being continually reminded of your worst qualities (as well as your best) can be exhausting—especially when you both amplify each other’s weaknesses. 

You’re meant to learn from each other. But until you both do the work of addressing those weaknesses, you’ll continually find each other’s company an unwelcome reminder. 

Often, it takes a separation to stimulate the growth that has to happen in each of you. Once you begin the process and you’re both working to improve yourselves, a renewed connection can help you both continue on the right path. 

7. Twin flame relationships are lesson-focused. Soulmate relationships are connection-focused. 

Once you’ve learned the lesson (or lessons) your twin flame is there to show you (and that you’re meant to show them), then the relationship may end there. You may find yourself naturally drifting apart to thrive as separate beings. 

In fact, once you’ve both learned what you need to learn, separation may be the final lesson. Staying together could be the last thing holding each of you back from becoming the independent forces of nature you were born to be. 

That said, once you do grow as you’re meant to, twin flames often find their way back to each other. 

With soulmates, it’s different. Staying together makes you both stronger without compromising your independence or growth. 

Neither of you has to separate from the other to reach your fullest potential. 

8. Meeting your soulmate feels like a homecoming. Meeting your twin flame can feel like an intense awakening. 

Meeting your soulmate can be compared to finally reaching the place where you truly belong.

That’s because they possess complementary characteristics and personalities that provide a sense of comfort, support, and understanding, allowing them to forge a strong bond with each other. 

Conversely, twin flames offer an intense awakening experience as they mirror each other's strengths and weaknesses, compelling you to confront aspects of yourself that you were either unaware of or deliberately ignoring. 

9. With twin flames, a connection is immediately realized. With soulmates, it can take time for both parties to realize their special bond.

Connecting with your twin flame typically happens in an instant. Both parties can sense the other's energy and feel something special between them. 

With soulmates, it may take time for one or both parties to recognize the strong connection and for it to grow into something deeper.

Soulmates can move through different stages of friendship, from strangers to acquaintances to close friends or romantic partners. 

10. Twin flame relationships often involve spiritual growth, while soulmates may or may not cause one. 

The intense connection between the two halves of a twin flame union can help individuals become more aware of their true selves and reach higher levels of consciousness. 

On the other hand, soulmates don't necessarily have to trigger spiritual growth, although it can happen if one or both parties are open to it. 

Soulmate relationships tend to be more balanced in nature and supportive of each other's individual goals rather than a reflection of each other's deepest selves. 

11. Twin flame relationships are complex and intense, while soulmate relationships are more straightforward. 

Platonic or romantic soulmate relationships tend to remain sweet, steady, and straightforward. 

In general, soulmates tend to share a strong bond of mutual understanding, respect, admiration, and unconditional love that helps them navigate life's challenges together.

On the other hand, twin-flame relationships are more complex and intense due to their similarities and the level of intensity of their connection.

As such, twin flames can expect to experience a rollercoaster of emotions throughout their journey together.

Should You Marry Your Soulmate or Twin Flame?

Most people think of the traditional romantic relationship between two people regarding marriage. But if you have found a soulmate or twin flame connection, should you marry them?

The answer is complex. Here are some of the times when you should or shouldn't marry your soulmate or twin flame:

You Should Marry Your Soulmate or Twin Flame If:

  • You are both committed to your relationship and have discussed the potential long-term implications of marriage.
  • You share a strong bond you don't want to let go of, and you're willing to put in the hard work daily to keep the relationship going.
  • You both have a shared purpose in life that is only strengthened by your connection.

You Should Not Marry Your Soulmate or Twin Flame If:

  • You are not emotionally or mentally able to commit to marriage.
  • You don't share common values and beliefs that will impact your life together.
  • You are not ready to make the sacrifices that come with marriage, such as compromising on certain issues or putting your partner's needs first.

Signs You’ve Met Your Twin Flame

How do you know when you’ve met a twin flame? Every bond differs since they’re linked to unique soul journeys, but a few common indicators may signal you’ve found your missing spiritual link.

  • Magnetic / Divine Connection: Some mirror souls describe their connections as divine; others call them magnetic. Whatever the jargon, the bonds shared with a twin flame are visceral and unique. It will not feel like any other interpersonal tie in your life.
  • Intense relationship: Mirror soul relationships — romantic and platonic — can be destructively tumultuous or cosmically serene. Either way, they’re intense. 
  • You Push Each Other: Twin flames are two parts of a whole. As such, their passions and goals often align, causing them to push each other in productive directions. So if you’re with someone whose aspirations click with yours in uncanny ways, it could indicate they’re your one and only mirror soul.
  • You’re Very Similar: You enjoy the same flavors, dig the same styles, and share similar outlooks on life. Moreover, twin flames are often in the same or similar professional fields. If this sounds familiar, and the person you have in mind is your personality or aspiration doppelganger, it could signal that they’re more than just a “good fit.”  

Signs You’ve Met Your Soulmate

Twin flames and soulmates are different spiritual animals — and so are the associated signals. We’ve discussed the former; now, let’s turn our attention to the latter. What are some signs you’ve met a soulmate?

  • The Relationship Is Balanced: Soulmates tend to contribute equally to their relationships. Neither party feels like they’re being used — practically or emotionally — and soulmate partnerships tend to be smooth sailing. We’re not saying they never fight. But soulmates tend to communicate well when trouble hits, and they can usually resolve issues quicker than the average couple or friendship.
  • You Can Be Completely Yourself: Being human can be rough, especially when it comes to “fitting in.” At some point, every single one of us has tweaked and contorted our personalities in search of favor and grace. But soulmates don’t feel the need to put on airs around one another and can be exactly who they are without a hint of self-consciousness.
  • You Feel Like You’ve Known Each Other Forever: After you meet a soulmate, you may forget what life was like without them around. Most people lucky enough to find these next-level bonds feel like they’ve known each other for eternity. 
  • You Genuinely Believe in One Another: Soulmate relationships aren’t plagued with constant criticism or jealousy-rooted judgment. Instead, they’re marked by unconditional adoration, sprinkled with a bit of tough love when necessary. 

Which Is Stronger — Twin Flames or Soulmates?

The connection between twin flames is often described as a once-in-a-lifetime, all-consuming fire that burns with an intensity unmatched by any other bond. It's a connection that can be both exhilarating and challenging, pushing both people to grow and evolve. 

Twin flames have a unique ability to mirror each other's deepest desires and fears, creating a transformative journey of self-discovery. 

On the other hand, soulmates offer a steadfast, unwavering love that feels like coming home. Their compatibility and understanding create a foundation of trust and support that can weather any storm. While twin flames may burn brighter, soulmates offer a love that endures.

Can Twin Flames Be Together? 

The short answer is yes, but it’s usually more complicated than that. Whether a twin flame relationship becomes a truly unified whole depends on what both people bring to the relationship. It also depends on what both people learn from it. 

Twin flame relationships can be toxic if both “flames” simply amplify the weaknesses and insecurities of the other without either one exerting themselves to address those issues. 

It is possible, though, for twin flames to end up together in a healthy relationship if both can overcome their shared insecurities and triggers. 

Everything depends on what both are willing to do to grow and keep their connection alive. 

Now that you know the critical differences between twin souls and soulmates, which one sounds like the best fit for the person you have in mind? 

What comes to mind when you think of the possibility of losing them or living far away from them? What do you most love about your relationship and your time together? 

And what will you do today to celebrate what you have?