Chemistry is that elusive force that exists between people who are drawn to one another.
Sometimes it's immediate.
Other times it builds over time.
But how do you know it's genuine chemistry and not a fleeting attraction?
That's what we're breaking down today: intense chemistry signs.
What indicators signal you have intense chemistry with someone?
Also, is it possible to have one-sided chemistry?
We're tackling all these questions below and more.
So pull up a screen, and let's get started.
- What Is Chemistry Between a Man and a Woman?
- What Does Chemistry Feel Like For A Man? 15 Signs He's Feeling The Feels
- 1. You're Inexplicably Drawn to One Another
- 2. He's Affectionate in Public
- 3. No Topic Is Off Limits
- 4. He's a Great Listener
- 5. He's Complimentary
- 6. His Body Language Is a Green Light
- 7. He Flirts With You (And You Alone)
- 8. Time Flies When You're Together
- 9. He Tries To Get Your Attention
- 10. You Speak the “Same Language”
- 11. His Eye Contact Is Intense
- 12. You Enjoy Shared Interests and Values
- 13. He Can Be Himself Around You
- 14. He Cracks You Up
- 15. He Respects You Implicitly and Explicitly
- Can Only One Person Feel Chemistry?
What Is Chemistry Between a Man and a Woman?
Chemistry is an inexplicable force — some call it a spark — that exists between two people.
The word has a sexual connotation, but chemistry isn't necessarily intimate.
For example, television co-anchors are often tested to ensure they have “good chemistry,” which viewers prefer.
But for our discussion, we're focusing on intimate chemistry.
So what does that usually entail:
- Intense Attraction: Sometimes, it happens the moment you lock eyes. Other times, it takes a while to build. Either way, genuine chemistry is supported by intense attraction. It may not just be physical; an emotional or social appeal may also create the connection.
- Compatible Sense of Humor: People with good chemistry are always laughing together. They enjoy a similar sense of humor and can easily laugh at themselves around one another.
- Willingness To Compromise: A positive symptom of good chemistry is a willingness to compromise. You'll want to please each other, so you won't be stubborn about having your way all the time.
- Inexplicable Calmness: Have you ever been with someone who filled your soul with calm? Just being near them relaxed you. This is a potent sign of having chemistry with someone.
What Does Chemistry Feel Like For A Man? 15 Signs He's Feeling The Feels
We've reviewed a few general chemistry categories.
Now, let's explore specific signs that a man is “feeling the feels.”
1. You're Inexplicably Drawn to One Another
Have you ever met someone with whom you just clicked? When you looked into each others' eyes for the first time, the clouds parted, the stars aligned, and a bolt of cosmic lightning hit you both.
This type of instant connection usually is a sign of chemistry.
Reality Check: Try not to confuse physical lust with genuine chemistry.
2. He's Affectionate in Public
Does he reach for your hand in public? When you sit next to each other, does he have his arm around you? When walking, does he sometimes put his hand on the small of your back?
These are all signals that he has it bad for you.
Reality Check: Is he affectionate or clingy? The former is fine. The latter may be a red flag that you should keep an eye on.
3. No Topic Is Off Limits
People tend to hedge their bets when speaking to folks who make them comfortable. In those situations, we veer away from certain topics to keep things light.
But when you have chemistry with someone, those boundaries seem to fade away. You're able to talk about anything with ease.
Reality Check: Is the guy in question a talker? Is he a motor mouth with everyone? If so, he may just be an extreme extrovert.
4. He's a Great Listener
Is anything more comforting than being around someone who genuinely listens to what you say? When a guy has feelings for you, he'll go out of his way to focus on what's in your mind and in your heart.
Reality Check: Is he really listening or just going through the motions? Does he bring up things you said a few days later, or does he give you the “concerned-and-interested look” when you're chatting and never follow up?
5. He's Complimentary
As far as he's concerned, you look amazing, smell amazing, and have the most interesting things to say. Furthermore, he's always eager to tell you how great he thinks you are. He's also free with his compliments around other people.
When someone wants to shout their admiration for you from the rooftops, rest assured that they're into you.
Reality Check: Keep an eye out for love bombing, a common tactic of narcissists trying to pull in victims to fill their supply.
6. His Body Language Is a Green Light
Did you know that approximately 90% of communication is non-verbal? So if a man displays positive body language, it is a sign that he is into you.
Common indicators include always facing you, touching his neck and chin when you're around, and letting his touches linger.
Reality Check: Body language isn't an exact science. Cultural and behavioral factors can impact how someone gestures and moves.
7. He Flirts With You (And You Alone)
Is he constantly winking at you? Smiling and teasing you? Does he go out of his way to include you in conversations and events? This is flirting, and it indicates that he's got the hots for you.
Reality Check: Does the guy in question flirt with everyone? Do they have a gregarious personality? Pay attention to how they behave with other people to get a baseline.
8. Time Flies When You're Together
You get together for brunch; before you know it, you're cuddled up admiring the moon. You had so much to say to one another during the day. Even when there were lulls in the conversation, it felt completely comfortable.
When time is a mere suggestion when you're together, congrats, he's more than likely very into you.
Reality Check: This is a fairly solid indicator. However, ensure you're not forcing the issue because you're desperate to be in a relationship and are willing to make anything work.
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9. He Tries To Get Your Attention
Don't you prefer spending time with folks you get along with? When a guy has feelings for you, he'll move heaven and earth to grab your attention and spend as much time with you as humanly possible.
Reality Check: Again, is he like this with everyone? Is he super friendly and always goes out of his way to include everyone in everything?
10. You Speak the “Same Language”
You haven't known each other for a long time. Yet, you finish each other's sentences and use similar vocabulary.
This synergy could result from having similar upbringings, or he could be mirroring you subconsciously because he's emotionally attracted to you. Either way, it's a sign of chemistry.
Reality Check: Mirroring can be good or bad. Some men use it as a manipulation tool. Be careful.
11. His Eye Contact Is Intense
Eye contact is a biological attraction indicator. After all, we like to look at things we find pleasing. So if you frequently catch him looking at you, he's probably enraptured. Also, notice how he looks at you when you're together.
Are his eyes darting every which way, or are they focused on you? If it's the latter, there's chemistry.
Reality Check: If you catch him looking at you and he immediately turns away, it may have just been a coincidence. Eye contact fueled by chemistry is intense.
12. You Enjoy Shared Interests and Values
It's natural to get along better with people who share our viewpoints, interests, and values. So if all those things align, the chances of you clicking increase. You don't necessarily need the same background, but having similar outlooks is key.
Reality Check: Do you really share the same interest and values, or are they saying what you want to hear? Don't gobble up their “game.”
13. He Can Be Himself Around You
We can sense when someone is uncomfortable around us. And sure, it's normal to be a bit nervous or shy in the early days of hanging out with someone. But if he quickly loosens up around you, you likely have great chemistry.
Reality Check: Again, narcissists can come across as very comfortable and charming in the early days of a relationship. Also, some people over-share early in a relationship because they have self-esteem issues.
14. He Cracks You Up
A shared sense of humor goes a long way. Are you always cracking up together? Do you find the same movies funny? Or, on a more esoteric level, does he seem “lighter” around you? If you answered yes, he likely appreciates your presence — a sign of chemistry.
Reality Check: Is he a comic by trade? The class clown? Always the life of the party? If so, it may not be chemistry but instead a fun personality.
15. He Respects You Implicitly and Explicitly
Respect is sexy, and when a guy is always thoughtful and considerate about your boundaries and personhood, it signifies deep and sincere chemistry.
When someone is only physically attracted to you, they won't go out of their way to respect your wishes, thoughts, and feelings.
Reality Check: Respect isn't pampering and coddling. Try to distinguish the two.
Can Only One Person Feel Chemistry?
Can chemistry be one-sided? It's a point of debate.
One camp insists it's impossible. Their belief is rooted in the idea that mutuality is an inherent part of the formula. For them, it's about having bonding patterns that sync up perfectly.
The other side sees the situation more singularly. They believe that chemistry is primarily linked to personal hormones, making it possible for one person to be “triggered” without the benefit of mutual attraction.
Generally speaking, it's important not to confuse lust with chemistry. Pinpointing that line involves correctly reading the other person's signals.
So when you're dealing with a guy and trying to determine if he has feelings, pay close attention to how he treats you and be as subjective as possible.
While we've provided several signs of chemistry, it's important to remember that attraction has a mind of its own.
Sometimes, people that make no sense on paper get along beautifully. So don't be afraid to follow your gut. Let love light your path.