17 Surprising Ways You Can Be a Better, More Supportive Husband

Marriages may be made in heaven, but great husbands are made with effort. 

If you want to be the spouse your partner deserves, it takes more than just showing up – it requires intentionally nurturing your relationship day after day. 

Luckily, small, thoughtful gestures and changes in attitude can transform an okay marriage into a phenomenal one. 

We’re sharing some surprisingly simple tips to help you become a more supportive, loving husband – one your wife will feel respect and desire even more.

With a little creativity and a ton of heart, you can build a partnership that stands the test of time.

What Are the Basic Qualities of a Good Husband?

Being a good husband goes far beyond just being a good provider.

The key qualities that make up a loving, supportive spouse include:

  • Communication – A good husband fosters open and honest communication with his wife. He shares his feelings, listens without judgment, and makes his partner feel heard.
  • Respect – Treating your wife as an equal partner is paramount. Value her opinions, honor her wishes, and support her goals.
  • Thoughtfulness – From little romantic gestures to helping with chores, thoughtfulness shows your wife she's a priority.
  • Loyalty – Be faithful in all aspects of your marriage. Prioritize your relationship and stand by your partner through thick and thin.
  • Patience – Marriage takes work. Demonstrate patience through the ups and downs, and always assume the best in your partner.

Bringing these qualities to your marriage each day lays the foundation for a loving, lasting relationship.

How to Be a Better Husband: 17 Hacks for a Happy, Healthy Marriage

Marriage takes effort, but small, thoughtful gestures can make a big difference.

Use these 17 simple yet powerful tips to transform yourself into the amazing, supportive husband your wife deserves.

couple cleaning house together How to Be a Better Husband

With a little creativity and a ton of heart, you can build a partnership that stands the test of time.

1. Learn Her Love Languages

Discovering how your wife feels most loved and cared for – her love languages – is key to connecting more deeply. Does physical touch make her feel secure? Does she light up when you give thoughtful gifts? Or do acts of service like helping around the house mean the world to her? 

Observe which gestures bring her joy, then make those a regular part of your relationship. Speaking her love language will make her feel cherished and understood. Don't just guess her language either; have an open conversation about what makes her feel most loved. 

2. Initiate Weekly Check-ins

It's easy to get caught up in the busyness of life and not connect emotionally. That's why it's important to intentionally carve out time each week to check in as a couple. 

Schedule a standing date, even if it's just a walk around the block or sitting on the porch together after the kids go to bed. No distractions. Phones off. 

Just quality time to talk about your feelings, goals, and relationship. Ask open-ended questions and really listen. This consistency keeps your bond strong through the ups and downs of life. 

3. Pull Your Weight with Chores

Nothing breeds resentment faster than an unfair division of labor at home. Make sure you're doing your fair share when it comes to housework, yardwork, childcare, meal prep, planning activities, emotional labor, and more. 

Don't wait to be asked, but proactively take tasks off her plate. If needed, have an open discussion and rework the chore split to balance the workload. Your willingness to help without being nagged will speak volumes about your respect for her time and needs.

4. Give Unexpected Surprises 

Surprise gestures don't need to be huge or costly to make an impression. Cook her favorite meal after a long day at work. Bring home flowers or a treat from her favorite bakery for no occasion at all. Draw her a bubble bath when she's stressed. 

Even a sweet love note hidden for her to find can brighten her day. These thoughtful surprises, big or small, remind her she's always on your mind and make her feel loved.

5. Compliment Her Regularly

Freely sharing heartfelt compliments is a simple but powerful way to boost your wife's confidence and happiness. Compliment her appearance, talents, accomplishments, values, and more. 

man hugging woman from behind how to be a better husband

But don't just stick to the superficial stuff – also affirm her character and inner beauty. Tell her what you admire about her as a person. Your unprompted praise has immense power to uplift her and make her feel truly seen.

6. Set Aside Couple Time

It's all too easy for kids, work, and other life demands to crowd out meaningful couple time. Make it a priority to set aside regular date nights, whether you dress up and go out or just spend intentional time together at home without distractions. 

Guard this quality time in your schedule zealously. Don't let other commitments encroach. Date nights are essential to nurturing intimacy, laughter, and romance. They strengthen your bond and remind you both why you fell in love in the first place.

7. Display Physical Affection

Physical touch is a powerful way to nurture intimacy and connection in your marriage. Be affectionate often – hold hands, give shoulder rubs after a long day, and surprise her with a kiss. 

Flirt and seduce her rather than letting sex become a routine obligation. Cuddle in bed and touch affectionately without it always leading to the bedroom. Meeting one another's needs physically fosters security, passion, and lifelong attraction. 

8. Share the Mental Load 

In many households, the wife ends up handling an unfair share of the invisible ‘mental load' like tracking details, making plans, and managing the household. Make a conscious effort to fully share this burden. 

Mark calendars, schedule kid activities and appointments, and plan date nights. Offer to grocery shop and meal prep. Your initiative goes a long way in making her feel like an equal partner.

9. Have Her Back in Public

When you're out together in public, make sure your wife feels valued and respected by you at all times. Open doors for her, place a hand supportively on her back and introduce her proudly to friends. 

Avoid belittling her or joking at her expense, even playfully. Your public loyalty will make her feel secure and cherished.

10. Appreciate Her Uniquely

Avoid the trap of comparing your wife negatively to your mother, friends' spouses, or media ideals. Appreciate, compliment, and support the unique individual that she is. Praise her natural personality quirks and talents. 

Encourage her to pursue hobbies and interests that stoke her interests. Your admiration for the one-of-a-kind person she is will help her thrive. 

11. Ask How You Can Help 

Rather than assume you know what your wife needs, ask regularly what you can do to be a more supportive, loving partner. Truly listen when she shares, then follow through. 

Surprise her by anticipating a need she has before she asks. She will feel heard and valued, knowing you want to fulfill her needs.

12. Plan Surprise Getaways

An occasional weekend getaway keeps the spark alive. Totally surprise her by planning a trip, handling all the details, and whisking her away. Dedicate this time just to relax, have fun, and reconnect as a couple. 

Escape everyday life and make meaningful memories together, exploring new places. It strengthens your lifelong bond.

13. Be Open and Honest

Open, honest communication cements intimacy in marriage. Have the courage to have difficult conversations, even when uncomfortable. Listen without judgment when your wife shares her feelings, needs, hopes, and fears. 

Reciprocate by expressing your own emotions vulnerably. Share the excitement and celebrate victories together. Compliment her daily. Honesty breeds trust, while secrecy corrodes it. Keep no secrets and get any issues out in the open quickly.

14. Laugh Together  

Humor and playfulness are essential ingredients for a thriving marriage. Seek out opportunities for laughter each day together – trade funny memes, watch comedy shows, and reminisce over silly shared memories. 

Be silly together, and don't let embarrassment stop you. Laughter is medicine; it relieves stress, lightens moods, and forges deep intimacy. A relationship filled with genuine laughter is a relationship filled with joy.

15. Put Down Your Phone

In this age of constant distractions and screens, giving your wife your undivided attention means everything. Make it a rule not to check your phone during conversations or dinner. 

When she's sharing something important, look into her eyes and listen fully without multi-tasking. Schedule regular device-free quality time. She'll know she's your priority when you're fully present.

16. Trust and Respect Each Other

Mutual trust and respect are absolutely essential pillars of a strong marriage. Believe the best in your partner's abilities and motives. Uphold her independence and right to privacy. Avoid belittling, controlling, or possessive behaviors that erode mutual respect. 

couple hugging in kitchen cooking how to be a better husband

Choose to honor, celebrate, and support the amazing woman you married. Water the seeds of trust and respect to grow a healthy relationship. 

17. Say “Thank You” 

Gratitude cements strong relationships. Make it a daily habit to thank your wife for all she does and gives – for her hard work, sacrifices, and acts of service. Write little love notes just to say thanks. Tell her specifically what you appreciate about her. 

Thank her for the little things most partners take for granted. Your heartfelt gratitude will uplift her and fortify your lifelong bond.

Understanding What a Wife Most Needs from Her Husband

At the core, what a wife most needs from her husband is to feel genuinely loved, valued, and respected for who she is. She needs a partner who makes her feel secure – someone who has her back, appreciates her strengths, admires her quirks, and cherishes her individuality. 

A wife needs a husband who takes the time to listen, communicate, support her goals, and help shoulder life's burdens. 

She needs laughter, intimacy, trust, and honest human connection. Fundamentally, she needs to feel deeply understood, appreciated, and cared for by the man she gave her heart to.

10 Marriage Tips for Husbands 

Beyond the essentials, there are many small ways you can enrich your marriage daily. Here are ten tips to deepen your connection, bring more joy, and nurture your lifelong partnership:

1. Display photos of your happiest memories together to recall the magic of your relationship and how your love has grown over time. 

2. Take over the household duties she dislikes the most to lighten her load – whether that's laundry, cleaning bathrooms, yard work, etc. Your willingness to tackle her most loathed chores shows your care.

3. Surprise her by planning a fun weekend activity she enjoys – whether a hike, wine tasting, concert, or mini road trip. Thoughtful surprises bring joy.

4. Write old-fashioned love letters to rekindle the romance. Handwritten notes expressing your feelings have power.

5. Prioritize regular vacations together to relax, have adventures, and explore new places. Escaping everyday life nurtures your connection. 

6. Cuddle without expectation of sex simply to provide comfort, affection, and emotional intimacy.

7. Read relationship books together for fresh insights and open discussion on strengthening your partnership.

8. Cook her favorite foods on special occasions like birthdays or anniversaries to show you care.

9. Initiate fun traditions like monthly game nights or weekly pizza Fridays to spark playfulness. 

10. Thank her parents for raising the incredible woman you love. Expressing gratitude cements bonds.

Final Thoughts

Being an amazing husband takes effort, intention, and an open heart. But small gestures of thoughtfulness and support each day can transform an okay marriage into an extraordinary one.

There's always room to grow. No matter where you are in your relationship journey, using these tips to love your wife better will bring you both greater joy and purpose.

When you pour your heart into nurturing lifelong love, the rewards are immeasurable. At the end of the day, being the husband she deserves is a gift to you both.