Life Coaching Archives

How to Put Your Negative Thought Committee to Work for You

July 20, 2020June 1, 2012 by Barrie Davenport

A guest post by Jennifer Boykin of Life After Tampons

So, this year is turning out to be a dream year for me. And, of course, only I could make that a bad thing.

Here’s how:

In February, I launched my dream business. I’m finally giving myself the gift of doing work that matters. My project is going really, really well.

In fact, my work was noticed by someone “big,” and now I’m part of an incredible mastermind group of kick-ass entrepreneurs all creating game changing businesses.

And that’s where the trouble really began.

A few weeks ago, I went to meet my team in New York for the first time. As you’d expect, they are all amazing people. I kept pinching myself that I was even allowed to be there. (Hear the insecurity already creeping in?)

I learned a lot and, by the time the weekend was over, I was on fire to do my work.

But then . . .

. . . I came home.

And, waiting for me in my office was my entire Itty Bitty Shitty Committee (IBSC) — otherwise known as the “voices in my head.”

My IBSC has been with me a long time. So long, in fact, that I have to replay their negativity messages on 8-track cassettes.

My IBSC tells me I’m . . .

25 Ways to Become the Best Version of Yourself

March 7, 2022May 20, 2012 by Barrie Davenport

Is it possible to be happy with yourself right now and still want to change your life?

Can you be content and evolving at the same time?

I believe you can.

In fact, I think this is a powerful balance we should strive for every day — the balance between happiness in the moment and action toward the best version of ourselves.

Leo Babauta of Zen Habits recently wrote a beautiful post on contentedness.

He suggests that you don’t need to wait for change, for something better, for the future, before you are content. You can be content right now if you choose to see all of the good and beauty around you.

I know this is true. I know we experience life right now, in this moment. This moment is our only reality. If right now is spent longing for some vision of the future, we haven’t truly lived and enjoyed the blessings of right now.

Longing and struggling against “what is” causes suffering. Wishing for more, for something different, for something better at the expense of contentment in the moment robs us of life.

However, as someone who is a seeker and has spent most of my life intrigued by personal development, I have a vision of the best version of myself. I know that inner and outer change, evolution, and transformation will happen to me whether or not I define how that will happen.

But I know that I can define how that will happen. I have that personal power, and I’d much rather be the creator of my life rather than a reactor to it.

So how does one be a creator and be content at the same time? How do you become the best version of yourself while loving yourself just as you are?

Who’s Holding Your Feet to the Fire? The Power of Intentional Accountability

July 20, 2020April 18, 2012 by Barrie Davenport

Before I became a coach, I didn’t know much about coaching.

I’d heard the term “life coach” tossed around, but I didn’t understand why people needed to be coached in their lives. Why would I need someone else telling me to do what I already know I should be doing?

(Now I know that coaching has nothing to do with being told what to do.)

If the coaching profession could be distilled to the single most valuable tool for clients, it would be accountability.

Make Your Vision a Reality with a Theme for the Month

October 28, 2015April 10, 2012 by Barrie Davenport

In my previous post, I wrote about how essential it is to create a life vision for yourself and gave you an exercise for writing your own life vision.

Often when I do this exercise with coaching clients, after they have written their vision, they begin to panic. They have just written this detailed vision for their life, but it looks very little like the life they have right now.

Their unspoken (or sometimes spoken) fear is, “How on Earth am I going to make all of this happen?”

When you create a vision that incorporates every aspect of your life and involves hundreds of actions and changes, not to mention facing some fears and self-doubt, it can be a bit daunting. How on Earth does one make all of this happen?

10 Reasons Why You Need to Buck the Status Quo

August 17, 2020March 18, 2012 by Barrie Davenport

All of my life I’ve been a good doobie.

I was a rule follower.

I was the compliant child.

The pleaser.

I grew up in a household with more than its fair share of turmoil. Everyone around me was breaking the rules and creating havoc.

So it became my job to keep the peace.

Life Transitions:10 Ways to Boldly Go Through Them

August 17, 2020March 5, 2012 by Barrie Davenport

Here in Atlanta the weather has been crazy.

One day it is 40 degrees, then the next it’s 70. The trees and flowers are starting to bloom, yet we are hardly out of February.The last few days it’s been looking like spring but feeling like mid-winter.

This struggle of the seasons is so analogous to our personal life transitions. Winter is desperately trying to hold on, while spring is emerging in spite of winter’s weakening clutches.

How to Create Your Back-Up Plan

November 26, 2020December 4, 2011 by Barrie Davenport

If only life were predictable.

Do you ever wish for that?

We merrily (or sometimes stoically) move through our days and weeks and years — following our plan, doing our thing, pursuing our goals.