Archives for February 2012

How to Make Big, Bold, Wildly Exciting Things Happen in Your Life

You're going to think this is a weird way to begin this article when you read what I write next, but bear with me. You'll see the relevance shortly.

Sometimes in the morning when I'm taking a shower, and it's cold in the house, I can stand under the warm water forever. It feels so good and relaxing that I want to linger there, just enjoying the warm comfort of it.

In fact, I have found myself internally negotiating for more time, because I know I have other important things to do. I'll allow myself just 20 more seconds, 1 more minute, counting backward from 100. Just a little more time in the warm, steamy water. My internal negotiator clearly likes the warm water too.

Over time I've learned that once I'm in the shower, unless I have something really pressing (ie: plane to catch, meeting to attend, water getting cold), I will allow myself to linger far longer than my higher self really wants to. In the scheme of things, I don't want to die saying, "I had thousands of 1-hour warm and cozy showers."

Recently, knowing that both me and my internal negotiator don't have much will power under warm water, I have given executive authority to my right hand. I now allow my right hand to go directly to the shower handle without consulting me or the negotiator and turn it quickly to the off position. And once it's off, it stays off. There's no thinking or negotiating involved. My right hand just takes action.

This leads me to the main premise of this post.

Fear is not the biggest deterrent to living boldly and having exciting things happen in your life. Comfort is.

Fear is an uncomfortable emotion.

When we are fearful, we are motivated to make the feeling of fear go away. And if we are evolved enough, we realize that the best antidote to fear is to do the thing that scares us. Avoiding the fearful thing only prolongs the discomfort.

Comfort, on the other hand, is an easy state of mind. (more…)

How To Use The Next 4 Weeks To Do Something Life-Changing In 2013

December is a crazy little month. It is a month of highs and lows. Stress and relaxation. Endings and beginnings. The build-up to the holidays is a mixed bag of joy in the season, anxiety over money, closeness with family, sadness over loss, stress and over-commitments, relaxation with time off from work, over-indulgence with food,…  Continue Reading

Registration for The Simple Self-Confidence Course

You asked for it. And now it’s here. Back in the fall, I sent a few questions to all of my readers asking what personal development issues would most interest you for a course. The resounding response was self-confidence. Along with Erin Falconer of the mega personal development blog Pick the Brain, I have created…  Continue Reading

Wishing You Amazing Peace

My dear friends, I hope this holiday season has been filled with joy for you. I hope you have connected with family and friends but also have found time for quiet reflection and continued growth in becoming the person you want to be. The seeds of all positive change begin with the creative process of…  Continue Reading

You Are Invited! A Free Self-Confidence Webinar

At some point in our lives, all of us have suffered a crisis of confidence. Whether it was a situational issue or a lingering dark cloud of insecurity, a self-confidence problem holds us back from living fully — from living a bold and fearless life. Many people believe that a lack of self-confidence is an…  Continue Reading

20 Simple Ways to Stoke Your Self-Confidence

Once upon a time there was a small child known as you. This child was born into the world pure and perfect, aware only of its own needs. If those needs were met, if someone held you, fed you, kept you safe and warm, your world was perfect. Even as you got a bit older,…  Continue Reading

How to Take Control with Confidence

Do you ever feel like your mind has a mind of it’s own? Does it seem like it plays tricks on you, behaving against your higher judgement or desires? I’ve been suffering from a tricky mind for the last few weeks, but I finally turned the trick around on my wily mind and took control….  Continue Reading

Self-Love That Lasts A Lifetime

“To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance.” ~Oscar Wilde Is February 14 a happy or a sad occasion for you? At different stages of your life, you’ve probably experienced one feeling or the other. If you don’t have a romantic partner, or you’ve recently experienced a break-up or divorce, Valentine’s Day can…  Continue Reading

The Insidious Poison of Disengagement In Your Relationships

“The most important ingredient we put into any relationship is not what we say or what we do, but what we are.”  ~Stephen Covey A new relationship of any kind, even a new friendship, begins with the thrill of connection and recognition. In this new person, at least initially, we recognize the best of ourselves…  Continue Reading

Are You Sabotaging Your Career? 5 Behaviors You Need to Avoid

Your job is a huge part of your life. If you work a typical 40-hour work week, that’s around 2000 hours a year spent on the job. You spend more waking time working than you do with your spouse, partner, children, or friends. Hopefully, your job is more than a job. Hopefully, it is your…  Continue Reading

The Most Important Tool You'll Ever Need For Life Transformation

Sometime in your life you will go on a journey. It will be the longest journey you have ever taken. It is the journey to find yourself. ~Katherine Sharp If I could have only one tool at my disposal to help me on my journey of personal growth, self-awareness, and life transformation, it would be…  Continue Reading

Life After Tragedy: The Unexpected Gifts in Catastrophic Events

A guest post by Jennifer Boykin of Life After Tampons It’s been nearly twenty years since I held my newborn daughter Grace while she died. In those days, I thought I would never be free of my sorrow. But I have been, and there are actually great long stretches of my life when I don’t…  Continue Reading