“The secret of attraction is to love yourself. Attractive people judge neither themselves nor others. They are open to gestures of love. They think about love, and express their love in every action.” ~Deepak Chopra
Here's the bottom line: we want people to like us. Even when we say we don't care what people think, we really do.
We desire to be loved, respected, and viewed in a positive light. Our human interactions are vital to our sense of well-being, self-esteem, and happiness. When we discover that someone doesn't like us or rejects us in some way, our emotions can run the gamut from defensive indignation to deep pain and profound sadness.
For any of us who have attempted to be likable and attractive to everyone, you eventually realize the futility of this exhausting endeavor.
It is impossible to "make" everyone like you, and even if you could, you will ultimately lose your self in the process. When you morph into a people pleaser or an actor playing roles to accommodate those you want to impress, you often alienate the very people you hope to charm.
Only when we see ourselves as lovable and embrace our own authentic qualities, needs, ideas, values, and personality traits, do we release the pheromones of being attractive to others. Although not everyone will be intrigued by your authenticity, those who are attracted to you will generally be emotionally intelligent, mature individuals who value genuine and unaffected relationships.
Self-love, self-confidence, and authenticity are the foundational elements of attractiveness. To strengthen this foundation and foster the transition from "trying to impress" to naturally attracting wonderful people into your life, there are some specific changes and shifts you can adopt.